Thursday, 10 November 2011

I am trying my hand at writing

Before I moved to the UK I used to write a lot. Mainly just poems and fairy tales, all of them ridiculously romantic and hopeful. Then I moved to the UK and there was no time to write, no energy left to try and put thought down into words.

The years past and I started to write again. It was no longer poems or romantic fairy tales but darker and slightly more explicit. And whilst some of them were OK they have definitely lost something that I used to have when writing back in Sweden. Partly I think it's because I changed language. I was always were good at words in Swedish, both spelling and knowing the meaning of words that most people didn't (though I have always sucked at grammar) and now I write in a language that isn't my first language and were I do not know the meaning of as many words, and my spelling generally requires spell check.
I think there are other reasons too, such as the person has changed and so has the stories I want to tell.

As part of needing to rethink what I am going to do with the rest of my life (thanks to the RA making it very clear that I can't do the things I wanted anymore) I bought a book about writing and already in the first chapter I realised something else which I have lost, I realised I don't do descriptive writing anymore. I specifically recalled a fairy tale that my Friends really like because of the description of the girl in the beginning, "with golden hair, like a field of corn in the sunshine" or something like that, so right now I am practicing descriptive writing.
The bit below I wrote about a can of red bull during my lunch break at work. I thought I should try to pick something very random and see if I could write something about it:

"The can stood on a dirty canteen table, crumbles of food and sauce sashes scattered around it. The can was open and empty, it's content drunk and the can forgotten. It's metal blue and silver shine in sharp contrast to the dull magnolia of the table it stood on."

It doesn't exactly make for exiting reading but I though it's a good start.

I even signed up for a evening course at Reading college but sadly it got cancelled at the last minute :-( So I guess for now I will just have to keep practicing on my own.

Tuesday, 8 November 2011

What's next

I haven't been happy at work for quite some time so the other week I asked for a meeting with my boss and told her that I either wanted a raise or for the agency (I temp through an agency for the agency) to start looking for something else. I was told I wouldn't get a raise and as such the looking commenced. Now I know i could just not have said anything and looked anyway but that would mean that 2 of the companies i would like to work for were out of the question and with the hours I work it would be very hard to go to interviews etc. Also and most importantly for me I believe in being straight forward even if the company I work for isn't, I guess I'm still a firm be liver that honesty pays and sure hope I wont be proven wrong.
As it stands the have now found someone else to do my jobs and in a couple of weeks I will be out of a job, the thing is I felt so much after taking the step so I do believe that was the right choice.
Now the problem lays in getting a job I want, I know from my past work history that I should not have a problem finding another job (the longest I've ever been unemployed is just over 1 week), but I also know that if I take any job to tie me over until I find a job I want, the likelihood is that I will get stuck there. Being a person that detest not working as it means not making any money I do have a tendency in the past to settle.
After getting RA and realising how precious life is I just don't want to waste anymore time.
So the question is what do I do now. Do I take a part time job to help me get along which will give me the time to still look or do I not risk it and take another crappy ass temp job with lousy pay hoping I'm able to still look for something else? Or is there a third option?